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April 22, 2020 | Costello

GFL – Page 0020

Grouping For Looks is a page-by-page retelling of the Looking For Group saga through the lens of a mirror universe where Cale is a goateed tyrant and Richard is a holy soul trying to set him on a good path.

INT. MOUNTAIN – MECHASTONE – DAY

Chief Engineer Toyk sweats on his throne, surrounded deadly enemies and impotent allies. Cale holds a sword to Toyk’s throat. 

TOYK
If you kill me, you’ll never learn where the troll camp is. 

CALE
Are your officers so stupid that not one of them could tell me in exchange for his life. 

Toyk eyes his officers nervously.

TOYK
…yes..?

A gnome officer scoffs at his superior’s words. A fellow officer elbows him in the side, and he finally gets why Toyk insulted him. 

KRUNCH
We should just butcher the remainder of the gnomes until one of them talks. 

TOYK
That might get you the location of the troll camp, but not what you truly seek. 

BENNY
You know where the Sword of Truth is?

KRUNCH
So torture him until he tells us. 

TOYK
I know where the trolls are, I know where the Sword of Truth is, aren’t you worried about what other answers you might lose to questions you don’t yet know you have?

Benny, Krunch, and Cale exchange glances.

BENNY
As long as you continue to be useful, you and your gnomes can live. 

RICHARD
*gasp*

Benny, Krunch, and Cale turn to Richard, who has wrapped every other gnome in the room in pillows. 

RICHARD
I really thought this was going to end with more gnomicide. Especially him. 

Richard points at the gnome officer who scoffed earlier. The expression on everyone’s face shows they agree they are surprised he’s still alive.

GFL Archives

Original: LFG Page 20

First Grouping For Looks: GFL 001

Previous Grouping For Looks: GFL 019