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June 5, 2017 | Costello

Mummy Mia! More Top Comments!

It’s the week after Wonder Woman came out and finally got the DC Cinematic Universe megafranchise on the rails, and the week before The Mummy reboot launches the Universal monsters’ Dark Universe megafranchise. We’re also a month shy of the release of Spider-Man: Homecoming, the first Spider-Man in the Tom Holland reboot of the character after Sony’s last reboot became a convoluted mess in an attempt to make a Spider-Man megafranchise. Because if you’re releasing a movie and it’s not part of a megafranchise, you are wasting everyone’s time!

I’m looking forward to the release of The Mummy. Oh, not because I have any intention of seeing it. It’s more of a morbid curiosity: Is anyone actually going to see this movie? How many movies will Universal force out if this movie fails? If The Mummy does so poorly that we never get the Dark Universe, will we be reading articles in 20 years dedicated to the megafranchise that could have been? Maybe a popular documentary will spark fan interest and there will finally be actual demand for these movies.

Yeah, this week is on the precipice of the next twenty years of pop culture. Wrap your brain about that. Heh. Y’know, cause The Mummy.

Anyone really excited about The Mummy, or predict a healthier future than I have? Let me know in the comments!

With that tangent out of the way, on to your top comments for May 15th to 26th, 2017!

LFG 1087
Galileo Figaro
Pella: “Ah know tha’ human.”
Dragon born: “Are you sure? How can you even tell them apart? All humans look the same to me.”
Pella: “…Wow. Ye got some issues with yer specism there, ******.”
Dragon born: “But they’re all the same temperature!”

Joy Trujillo
This group of non-humans really needs to find a few of the better, less backstabby-ish humans to know. There must be some on that planet somewhere. Are they just hiding? Actually, I can’t blame them if they are.

David Eberhard
You can never forget those glorious burns!

TDA 170
Greg Verhagen
The score is 15 – Love, in this North Korea / Russia game. On the North Korean side, we have Tiny Dick, long lost brother of Kim Jong-un; and for Russia, their Leader, Vladimir Putin. This will be a battle for the ages sports-fans.

Kai Lowell
Dick just loves to cause a real racket.

David Wayne Martin
Is that Walter Sobchak?

LFG 1088
Mark Williams
When the guy in charge tells his only back up to leave him alone with four captives (one of whom seems merely to be flexing her biceps) that’s a sure sign that things are not quite as they seem

Speedy Marsh
Is there something cooking between Pella and Sir Dragonhisfeet? The Pella/ Dragon dude shippers probably wanna know whether to keep launching that ship, or to just finally drag ‘n drop it.

Ron Sanders
Amen, Benny! That’s the reason I moved away from Michigan. Why is that practice so popular there? Taco Pizza, really? Spaghetti casserole? Just make a lasagna and spare the world your mongrelized abominations!!

LFG 1089
Matthew Sanders
It’s moments like this that make us remember that Pella is a badass and is hindered more by the party than by the party being hindered by her.

Joy Trujillo
Pella is using a folded in half traitor as a step stool. And I’m just here using a step ladder… Reason #3496 why I’ll never be a cool as Pella. *sigh*

Andrew Cottrell
Is it just me or does Benny’s expression in the final frame scream “LOVE TRIANGLE”?
Cale and the dragon are both big, strong, loyal, persistent, and dumb enough for Benny to lead them around by the nose. And if Benny were with a dragon dude, people might assume she’s a dragon gal, and stop asking her about the color of her skin.

TDA 171
Marietta McCoy
That was a lot of work for someone who once said that he has no butt.

Xavia Carbine
I can’t tell which is more awesome- that in his bathroom is a picture of TD and Mickey Mouse, or that he had to take his pants off before handling his…. secondary evacuation protocol.

John Daly
Where can I pick up a copy of ACTION PHILOSOPHERS? My latest issue is from last year. It’s the Sartre issue, but the color pallette made me nauseous.

LFG 1090
Mikkel Ulriksen
that is delightfully uncomplicated. i like that.
he didn’t have a hidden agenda, he didn’t have some sort of grand plan, nope, he is just a greedy bastard.

Spencer McFunk Hepp
“Ahhh, so you’re really making yourself a walking sociological statement regarding the transition from a rural agricultural lifestyle to an urban mercantalist one, and how it changes p–”
“Nope. Wealth. And. Power.”

Connor Rosillo
Good enough for me, I can’t say I wouldn’t do the same. Anyone looking for a semi-reliable henchmen?
Now you know,
Costello